Bryan Wilson

Description

Friend and lover of Randal Sandal and Dota Extrordinaire, Bryan Wilson made his claim to fame through the indirect murder of Euan Jenkins in 2017 following his comment during a dispute: "Euan, you are so bad at this game; your feeding is out of hand, you could literally sate the hunger pangs of the entire African continent"- his comment was later awarded a quiplash.

Bryan's journey began in a humble Drumchapolean abode in which he learned to appreciate the wonders of the universe as well as Dota 2. Playing competitively, casually and just a tad authoritatively, Bryan is the de facto leader of the Four Fucklords, a group of positively retarded acolytes who serve under Randal Sandal. The group plays Dota 2, Toontown- occasionally- Sid Meier's Civilization V and Ricochet.

Early Life and education

The aforementioned Drumchapolean is where Bryan's story begins, but he actually spent most of his early life in the realm of Warcraft Blizzfuckland- the least ghetto neighborhood in Pennsylvania. Bryan was raised by a family of sadistic Orcs, stricken from his Drumchapolean residence and forced to learn to play World of Warcraft from an age as early as 3. Bryan's training programme for WoW was extensive, covering everything from the severe implications of misuse of the chat-wheel and transliterations of the incredibly diverse Orcish language. Bryan's conditioning continued into the age of Starcraft- he was forced to improve his clicks per minute as it was deemed by Cindy the Orc to be 'uncompetitive'- striking a severe blow to his confidence and standing within the Orc community. However, Bryan persevered, undeterred by orc slander and went on to win the 2008 Starcraft championships- good for him.

Bryan's momentuous win in the Starcraft tournaments put him on the competitive scene in ways unimaginable, and eventually he was selected as a team member for the rising stars of the Dota 2 Manilla Majors, Gaben's Angels; filling the vacancy left by former captain Scribes. He remains in this position and is expected to continue to hold it so long as poverty exists.

Relationship with Randal